Mortal Combat

Like most men I enjoy watching the occasional amateur chick fight. I have to stress the word “amateur” because there’s nothing exciting about watching professional female athletes beat each other up with rules and well-honed athletic techniques. I’m talkin bout the neighborhood fights that take place because Natondelaya found out that her boyfriend, Lil Boogie, got her former best friend, Lex’cedes, pregnant, right before he went to jail! Ohh snap!!

I just came across an article in The Chicago Tribune that made my day. Two women apparently had beef with each other, probably because of some trifilin dude that neither of them should’ve been messing around with in the first place, and they finally decided to throw down. The only problem is that one of the women, Charlis Harris, wasn’t there to slap box, she was was out to KILL!

The unidentified victim, whom I’ll refer to as Lex’cedes, claims that Charlis was following her in a car while she was driving so she stopped and got out to confront her. Before she could pull out her earrings and rub Vaseline on her face Charlis attacked her with acid AND tried to shoot her! WTF?! She hopped out the car with a container of acid in one hand and a gun in the other? Who goes to a fight with acid and a gun? And that’s not even her full arsenal, she also had a HAMMER! After she shot at Lex’cedes and missed she channeled the remainder of her rage toward busting up her car with the hammer before making her escape. WOW!

I’m imagining that she was rocking a Baby Phat toolbelt with a nine millimeter in place of the power drill?

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