Career Suicide: Chris Brown Edition

This picture is irrelevant yet hilariously appropriate

This picture is irrelevant yet hilariously appropriate

So by now you’ve certainly heard that 19 year old R&B singer Chris Brown was arrested on battery charges stemming from a physical altercation between him and his girlfriend, Rihanna (pronounced Ree-ann-ah…seriously).

If this is indeed true and felony charges are actually filed by the district attorney Chris Brown’s soaring career will crash harder than a crackhead locked in solitary confinement. Meanwhile, Ike Turner is giving Chris a big thumbs up from somewhere beyond the grave…

Chris Brown’s rabid female fan base will probably give him a pass no matter what he does as long he continues to dance and smile and they continue to think with their ovaries. Here’s a reader comment that I found on the Chicago Tribune website:

maniniahkeyandmaih from Philly, PA:

how he hit her and they went out for a very long time. he was in love wit her and he not even that type of person to hit a gurl maybe lil wayne. she set that up because he was “supposely” cheated on her. she ugly anywaysssssssssss me and vaniah, keyara, shemaiah hate her

Reading that comment seriously made my brain hurt. At first I thought it was fake but after a second look I realized that it’s just too authentically ignorant to be made up.

People are already digging into Brown’s past to determine if he has a history of violence or family issues that may have incited such behavior. Well it turns out that he once took karate and his father used to beat his mother (GULP!). If it turns out that he was also a big fan of Mike Tyson’s Punch Out on Nintendo you can consider this case signed, sealed and delivered!

There’s a saying that any publicity is good publicity but I can’t imagine that Michael Phelps, A-Rod and Chris Brown would agree.


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